I often say that one of the greatest gifts my mom ever gave me was the latitude and space to develop relationships with safe, caring adults outside our home – whether they were my friends’ parents, one of my mom’s close friends or a teacher. I think she instinctively knew that rather than diminish our mother-daughter relationship, these adults would make me feel seen and valued and provide solid counsel as I grew into adulthood. And they did.

My experience is not simply a pleasant anecdote.  Research shows that for young children and teens, having adult relationships with people outside the home “increases the likelihood that they will flourish…and become productive adults.” These relationships also make kids “more likely to complete tasks…, remain calm in the face of challenges, show interest in learning new things, volunteer in the community…and talk with their parents about ‘things that really matter.’”